We all know the data. Regular movement is beneficial to our bodies. It supports cardiovascular functioning, digestion, strength, bone density, flexibility, mobility, range of motion, sleep, energy, mood, and stress cycle release (which affects everything else).

Finding ways to regularly move is something we can pursue and benefit from regardless of our body size. So why is it so hard when the benefits feel so obvious?

Many fat folks struggling to move blame this on our own lack of willpower and discipline. Some of us have even wondered if we can’t move our bodies because of our size. This can understandably lead to considering crash diets, weight loss medications, and worse – believing smallness is the only way we’ll be able to move easier.

We get it. Bodies are complicated. And that fact that movement feels challenging probably has little to do with your size, age, or ability. So, let’s get curious and compassionate about the barriers that may be getting in the way of more joyful movement.

Food Comes First

If someone is in a bigger body and has had a difficult or severed relationship with movement, it’s likely they’ve also struggled in their relationship with food. Food and movement are the primary ways most folks attempt to manipulate their body size, and most of us fat folks have been pressured or coerced into attempting weight loss at some point in our lives.

Many people need to heal their relationship with food before they’re able to consider reconnecting to movement (breaking up with dieting is typically step one).

There could be many personal reasons for this, but evidence suggests that people are often still in an energy deficit after years of restriction. This affects not only our physical energy, but how much cognitive energy it takes to do something as difficult and emotionally charged as reconnecting to movement.

Relationship to Movement

Moving means arriving in and with our bodies. This can take us to a much deeper place of embodied healing, but it means also feeling all the discomfort that embodiment can bring!

When we move, we feel our chests heave and our lungs expand, our shirts grow sticky with sweat and our arms, tummies, or breasts jiggling with each shift. We might hear the echoes of painful words from family members, coaches, bullies, P.E. teachers, or random street harassers. We may feel hypervisible to the world, now not just taking up space with our larger bodies, but with a moving larger body.

Many of us in plus size bodies have never known a relationship that wasn’t rooted in a sense of punishment and discipline. So many of us have only ever exercised primarily for the goal of weight loss or weight maintenance. And since we know intentional weight loss is unsustainable for the majority of the population (95-97%!), it’s no wonder that the fitness industry has capitalized on this opportunity to convince us this is a failure of our own performance.

Injuries

When reconnecting with movement, we may come in with fresh zeal and resolutions around “finally getting fit.” In our enthusiasm, we may try to pick things up where we left them before our last lapse, pushing ourselves harder and farther than our bodies are actually ready for. Plus, while movement is a highly individualized issue, we are often given broad, standardized advice that may not actually reflect what our bodies – as they are NOW – need.

Both of these influences can quickly lead to injuries – tendonitis, bursitis, sprains, strains, and dislocations. The best treatment for all these? Rest. If every time we try to move we end up hurting ourselves, we’ll blame ourselves for not being strong, fast, or enduring enough – or worse, for being the size and weight that we are. This can turn into a self-perpetuating restrict-binge pattern in our relationship to movement.

Environmental Accessibility

One of the most common barriers for trying to move our bodies is accessing a world not built with them in mind. From a lack of basic athletic clothes (few brands carry options past 1-2X but this one does!) to environments that do not comfortably serve all bodies (few gyms consider weight capacities or larger sizes when selecting items like chairs, bath towels or even treadmills), we are sent messages that we don’t belong at every turn.

More recent moves towards “inclusivity” have shown more smallfat folks (XL-2X) in athletic marketing, but ultimately still leave out folks in larger bodies, and even that small act has inspired rancor from the fat-hating masses.

Cultural Safety

If by some miracle we are able to find comfortable clothing that we also find aesthetically appealing, it does not mean we’ll have a safe and affirming space in which to move. Whether a fat person is at the gym or in outdoor public spaces, strangers feel the call to share an opinion on their existence. While the most obvious harassment comes in the form of slurs and humiliation, it also comes from insidious, well-intentioned enthusiasm. We may be treated with verbal or nonverbal signs of disdain and disgust from other gym patrons, infantilized by unsolicited advice, or fetishized as a weight loss inspiration story waiting to happen.

I will never forget when I had started a slow-jogging practice in my neighborhood and someone drove up next to me, slowed down, and yelled “Good for you! You’ve got this!” out her window. I was livid – would this person have invaded the space of a thin jogger for such a comment? And this, by far, was the least harmful thing I’ve heard yelled at me from car windows in my life.

Provider Competence

Let’s imagine that as fat folks, we have found clothes that fit well and an affirming space where we’re not judged or treated differently for our size. Sadly, there is also the risk of harm from providers leading classes or personal training who don’t bring an understanding of the needs of bigger bodies and a creative spirit of modifications. If you treat every size body the same, this is also failing fat folks.

The first time I followed a Jessamyn Stanley video, she advised a wider stance to make room for my belly in a forward fold, despite that not being “proper” yoga form. When I did this, I had audible cracks all the way down my spine and I almost cried in relief. I’d never felt what it was meant to feel like because I’d sucked in my belly and tried to mimic thin yoga teachers before.

Myths of Movement

Another common barrier is the narrative around what movement is and is not. Do any of the following sound familiar? How have these myths gotten in the way for you?

The good news is, every single one of these is false. So let’s explore what’s possible…

Exercise vs Movement

For many of us, the word ‘exercise’ conjures with it the myths stated earlier; connotations of punishment, and discipline of an unruly body. It is a word that venerates pain and ignores signals from the body (see the extreme case of Pukie the Clown & Uncle Rhabdo, the unofficial mascots of Crossfit). It is domineering, conquering, nonconsensual, and patriarchal in its approach.

With full freedom to create something new, what would it be like to move our bodies with attunement, intuition, attention, embodiment, functionality, joy, and playfulness? What would it be like to consent to chosen levels of discomfort with unconditional permission to change your mind without shame? To grow into our edges in a loving container that sustainably supports doing so?

The idea of pursuing movement in this way may seem like a lofty and wholesome dream. This description is meant to entice you of course, but it does not mean this work is always soft and easy. It is a minefield of triggers, takes lots of trial and error to find what works for you, and continuous discernment between your own values and invasive oppressive thoughts.

Nature as Your Ally

Consider skipping the gym or any other specific locations that have involved coercive or negative experiences while you rebuild your relationship with moving. Trying to write new narratives is easier in novel or soothing spaces. Nature can be a great resource in this way – finding a way to be outside not only avoids the crowds of gyms, but also may bring a sense of relief connecting to something bigger than yourself. Finding a sense of awe regularly has a strong impact on our physical and mental health.

Nature is also a wonderful playground for pursuing what interests you. In addition to plain old walking, there are endless ways to mindfully engage with and learn about the world while moving in it – mushrooming, tidepooling, birding, rockhounding, etc. There are bigger gross motor activities that allow you to get to cooler spots and see even more remote things – kayaking, paddleboarding, hiking, mountainbiking, climbing, snowshoeing, etc. And skill-based movement that tests your knowledge of wilderness and tracking of the environment around you – backpacking, camping, firetending, shelter-making, mapping, fishing, hunting, etc.

If you pursue your own passions, hobbies, and interests, it’s likely you’ll also find some movement connection. Move for fun, play, and pleasure, and all the physical benefits will follow for a more sustainable practice. Thinking about what you did as a child for fun is often a lucrative thought experiment. Make a list from A-Z and come up with an activity that involves movement that you could be open to, no matter how weird the answers end up being. (My own list starts with Archery, Bellydance, Chasing my cats, Ducks (feeding them)…) This activity gets the brain to open up to unusual ideas and re-imagining what movement can mean for them.

Honoring Diverse Needs

When experimenting with this new relationship to movement, also make space and take account of what your unique needs might be (with the body you are in now) and what works or doesn’t for you.

Love the social attunement of dance and the rage release of martial arts, but hate the intimacy and sensory experience of sweaty people touching each other? Maybe bellydance or boxing with a punching bag is the way to go. Whether you hate sand getting everywhere or despise wearing multiple layers to stay warm, taking your sensory needs into account can be a game changer. Overstimulation or understimulation can also narrow our window of tolerance making it harder to stay grounded during challenges. Would you prefer an environment that is quieter and more solitary like swimming laps alone, or social and exhilarating like a rave spin class?

Alternatively, slowing down and mindfully feeling each movement and breath can be a needed respite from the high energy demands modern life asks of us every day. Yoga, tai chi, qi gong can be great for gentleness, restoration, mobility and range of motion, and stress management.

And yet, while embodiment is often touted as a huge benefit of movement, there may be some people with severe trauma, chronic pain, or high interoception levels that find focusing on bodily sensations to be activating. There’s no right or wrong answer, it’s just what makes sense for you.

Lastly, this conversation must touch on the impact of ageism, ableism, and healthism. These three spectres, even in the world of fat liberation, continue to exist and gnaw at the integrity of the movement.

We can rewrite all the rules and make movement as accessible and sustainable as possible, and there will still always be people who cannot incorporate movement into their lives regularly due to disability, chronic health conditions, and the unending labor of surviving capitalism. There will be people for whom movement will never feel safe again due to their experiences. There will be people who just dislike moving enough that the benefits are not worth it for them.

That’s ok.

There is no moral hierarchy between a professional athlete and someone who is generally sedentary. Health is a morally neutral aspect of our lives, and only influenced by lifestyle choices in a tertiary way compared to genetics and the social determinants of health. People deserve to be treated with dignity and given equitable access to resources regardless of health status, ability, or age. Unfortunately, we know that when it comes to fat people though, that grace is even harder to come by. As incisively described in Good Fatty/Bad Fatty dichotomy, fat folks are afforded much better treatment from others when they appear to be physically active and capable, even more so if intentionally pursuing weight loss.

But ultimately no one is obliged to do anything with their body they don’t want to. You don’t owe the world movement or thinness or health. We don’t expect these things from wild animals – seals resting in the sun on the pier, sloths supporting whole ecosystems in their stillness – they don’t worry about these things, they just are. Why do we think we’re so different? So exceptional in our purpose? Not just another body, another animal, another slice of the universe experiencing itself?

Your body is good exactly as it is by the grace of life on this rock hurtling in space. Being human is also contained in our thoughts, emotions, how we communicate and care for one another, the art we create, the ideas we share, and the amazing things we get to witness and experience here. Measuring your worth by your movement is myopic to the whole of being human and a deep waste of your precious time here.